I am trying to work cutting out in with sewing to ensure I have a steady supply of blocks for sewing. It’s going very slowly because I am at the section of the book with 8 pointed stars. I am very over them. Not as over them as I probably will be when I get to sewing them and have to do all the inset seams, but I have just had an idea for how I can rotary cut them, as opposed to having to draw round templates, so the pace might pick up a little today.
Only 4 more days of sewing before I have to go back to work and I am starting to realise that At my current pace there is no way I can get all the blocks done by then. I may be able to get everything finished by the end of the weekend after. I guess that is not too bad. Only 83 blocks to go.
I did manage to get a fair bit done yesterday, but am just feeling frustrated because as usual it wasn’t anywhere near as much as I wanted to do. Plus the blocks I did do were kind of fiddly and each one seemed like it took forever. Then there was the huge amount of time I spent piecing inset seams on one block with hexagons and diamonds. The block is still not finished. I managed to get the hexagons to go together alright but I couldn’t get the diamonds to fit. Am hoping that I will be able to fix it by cutting new diamonds slightly bigger, I just have to figure out how big they need to be. Hopefully I won’t have to restart the whole thing from scratch. Though turning it into an appliqued block does have some appeal at this stage.
Am back, and struggling to get back into things. It has only been 2 hours though, so I suppose I shouldn’t be too harsh on myself.
I did finish reading Being and Nothingness while I was away. I wish I had something deep and meaningful to say about it, but I don’t. The end was a kind of anti-climax. I was for hoping for something in the conclusion that would tie everything back together and then everything would make sense, but there wasn’t and I am just feeling a little unsure about the whole thing.
I am trying not to stress about it too much and instead trying to focus on what I have left to do. 104 blocks. I really need to have a mammoth cutting out session tonight, which I am not really looking forward to. I am trying to resist the temptation to write the rest of the day off and go have a nap.
I managed to get a load of sewing done yesterday. Not as much as I would have liked but it gives me an idea of what I can do if I put my mind to it. I might actually get this thing finished by 31 January after all. At the very least I should be done by 3rd when I have to go back to work. I think. I’m probably not factoring in something obvious like cutting out time, or the need to sleep/rest.
This is the last post for a little bit. I am off up the coast today for my family’s Christmas. I have a bit of hand sewing done so hopefully will get something done, and Sartre is packed, so at the very least I might get to finish the book.
I have been struggling all week to stay motivated and keep on track. Part of the problem has been knowing that I would have today and tomorrow off work. As soon as I knew that I started to slack off a little and think – well it doesn’t matter if I don’t do it now, I can do it on my day off. So now it is my day off and I have way too much to do.
Finally it feels like summer, I am sitting here sweating. So just a quick post and then I am off to have a cold shower and sit in the aircon. I am starting to feel slightly more organised. I didn’t get any sewing done over the weekend, but did get loads cut out and most of my pre-christmas chores done. I finally decided to be realistic and booked Thursday and Friday off work. It was so slow I would have been sitting there twiddling my thumbs anyway and this way it takes a load of stress off. Plus I went out and bought some more fabric at lunch time which is another load off my mind. I thought I might run out between now and new year, and it was worrying me because I lent my car to my parents til then and there are no fabric shops with easy public transport access.
Finally got some blocks sewn last night and was actually enjoying it. I think I like this fabric better, and I have spent so much time cutting out that sewing was a relief.
I am feeling quite proud of myself. I set myself the target of getting to 860 blocks this week and so far I am at 859 which is not too bad. Now I just have to find someway to get to 900 by the end of next week and I will be right. Not sure about my chances of that as the week before Christmas is always completely nuts and I have so many errands to run. My car has to go in for new tyres today, groceries have to be got, and I need to go to the shops to get more thread and fusible web, baking to be done for various work related Christmas morning teas, house guests tomorrow night and somewhere in there I need to find time to mow my lawn and trim the hedge that is collapsing over the driveway after the mad storm we had last week. I’ll just have to try my best I guess. The one thing I am learning from this is that the important thing is just to keep moving forward. Even if you don’t get everything done, if you can do one thing a day that gets you closer to where you want to be it really helps. Better go and do some more cutting out.
I am making the reluctant decision to stop reading for a little bit. I have less than a hundred pages to go, and four days over christmas when I will need to be away without my sewing machine. I figure that’s a perfect time to finish my reading. So the book is getting packed and sent off with my luggage this weekend. In the meantime I am just going to focus on the blocks and getting as many done as possible. Which works as a plan, but doesn’t make for very interesting blogging I’m afraid.
I made the mistake of starting to read a novel on the train on the way home, so of course when I got home I didn’t do any sewing I spent the evening reading. Then I thought about going to bed but couldn’t sleep so here I am, sitting at my computer pondering Sartre, when I really should be getting some sleep so I am nice and perky for work tomorrow.
So freedom and death. Where does that come in. Well if according to Sartre freedom is choosing then death becomes a problem, because we can’t choose the manner and timing of our death. I am sure Sartre will come up with some way out of it, but it did get me thinking about whether we do or don’t choose our own deaths. I’m not talking about suicide, which I don’t recommend, but other types of dying. Okay you can’t choose the exact minute but you can set yourself on the path. When I choose to eat too much junk, knowing as I do that I have a family history of heart disease, stroke and diabetes in a way I choose my future heart attack. When I drive way too fast I choose my death by car accident. Sure I could get hit by a car on my way to work tomorrow but probably only if I choose not to look where I am going. I am prepared to concede that there is the occasional freak accident entirely beyond your control, like a satellite falling on your head, but it is our choices that put us in that place, at that time, in those set of circumstances. I don’t know if that is the kind of choosing that counts. Most of us wouldn’t consciously choose our deaths if we thought that was what we were doing, but then most of us don’t consciously choose our lives either. I’m starting to think that is where Sartre’s freedom falls down. Existentialism is supposed to be about the evidence of the experience, and I am not sure that the experience of freedom gels with Sartre’s theory of it. I don’t know in the end whether that really matters.
Anyway, enough long-winded ramblings. Now I am going to have to go and try to get some sleep.