I have arrived home from my travels safe and sound. Before I got back I had the best of intentions. I was going to be driven, organised and efficient. I was going to waste no time and get stuck right into finishing off the remainder of my goals. However, after four days back at work with little sleep because I am still adjusting to a new time zone I have to confess that I have accomplished nothing. Well, other than what I did at work and a little bit of gardening I did this morning.
I have lost pretty much all my enthusiasm at this point and am having a serious rethink about my goals. One in particular, the aim of turning all my 1000 quilt blocks into something by the end of the year. Firstly, I am starting to doubt that it is possible given the amount of time I have left. More importantly, I am starting to question why I am even doing it at all.
All the other goals I have set myself I can see the point of. There are of course moments when I hate the goal and I really don’t want to be working on it, but I can still see the point. Lets face it, losing weight isn’t fun. I don’t particularly enjoy having to watch what I eat. If I could eat chocolate all day instead I would. But I can see the point of it. I can see that there is a benefit of a healthier me at the end of it.
Similarly with my other goals (making 1000 quilt blocks, writing a novel, going 100 places I’ve never been before). While sometimes I have to force myself to work on them I can see that I am learning about myself and the world because I do them. In these cases a time limit is important too, because without a deadline procrastination is always possible.
Making these blocks into things is bugging me though. While there is a bit of a challenge in trying to make the blocks fit together, I usually don’t like the finished quilt. They are okay, but I don’t love them. Do I really want to spend the rest of the year making quilts I don’t love? I think the reason why I decided that making the blocks into things should be a goal was because I thought it would be an emotional drain having these blocks sitting here not being used. I thought I wouldn’t be able to move onto other things until they were gone. I am not entirely sure I was right about that, even if they were an emotional drain there are a number of other ways I could deal with them.
- I have a cupboard in my laundry I don’t use because I need a ladder to get to it. They could sit in there for years and never bother me.
- I could give them away. Plenty of people love receiving stray blocks, either to make quilts for charity of for themselves.
- I could use them as pieced backings for other quilts.
- I could even throw them out. Though that last one does sound like a tremendous waste.
But it could just be that I am going through a phase and what I really need to do is rummage through the pile of blocks again, find something simple to get started on, and just start working.